CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE: SILENT LUCIDITY. OR, IN WHICH DEAN HAS WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN A NEAR-DEATH EXPERIENCE AND THINGS GET WEIRD FOR HIM.
“There's a place I like to hide/A doorway that I run through in the night/Relax child, you were there/But only didn't realize and you were scared/It's a place where you will learn/To face your fears retrace the years/And ride the whims of your mind/Commanding in another world/Suddenly you hear and see/This magic new dimension/I-will be watching over you/I - I'm gonna help you see it though/I - will protect you in the night/I - I'm smiling next to you in silent lucidity” - Queensryche, “Silent Lucidity”
“All we can do now is wait and see” Penny said with a deep sigh of relief. Being on the University grounds did prove to be advantageous for her and Karen to treat Dean’s stomach wound. While she trained to treat battlefield wounds, Penny wasn’t sure if she was able to be successful in stopping any or all of the potential internal bleeding caused by the bullet that got Dean in the stomach. Karen paced back and forth, knowing she did that all she could do, and despite having that sinking feeling of déjà vu – all she could do now was what Penny said. Wait and see.
Dean Williams laid in the abandoned emergency ward, feeling tired and week. He closed his eyes…
Back at Movie Gallery, Donnie Bellum looked at Dean. “He is not a part of the outcome,” said Donnie. “His passing may or may not be a factor in the game.”
Joanne Carlson also looked at Donnie, then at Dean, and said “Not a major part of the game, no, but his existence must be prolonged so we can ensure the outcome is right.”
Dean found himself back at his childhood home. Both his parents looked at him and his father first spoke, “He is insignificant and useless to the game!”
His mother stood in defense and said, “Yet he does have a significant role in things to come.”
Dean looked around and was confused as to what was going on. “Am I dead? Am I being judged on all of my actions in my life?” He finds himself in his current apartment in Vegreville with Kevin, Karen, and Penny all sitting in the living room area.
“He tried to keep us on the right path,” said Kevin.
“Does he know as much as the other part of the game?” asked Penny.
“All I know is he must go on in the game,” said Karen.
“Well, I’m glad someone here has faith in me!” Dean exclaimed “But what is that game you keep referring to?”
A university professor in a lecture hall said “He is full of questions like the other one we spoke to.”
Sarah Bellum, holding her daughter Hailey spoke from behind Dean, while sitting in the lecture hall’s seating area. “But he is full of doubt,” she said.
“Well of course I am!” Dean said. “It’s not everyday a nuclear bomb strikes and I take a bullet in my stomach while foolishly trying to defend my girlfriend.”
Back at the Rose Bowl, Kevin and Karen sat at a table. “It was a noble act indeed,” said Karen.
“But an act that could have prematurely taken him out of the game,” a passing by waitress said.
“So, was I to let it hit Karen and let her die?” Dean asked.
His father appeared again. “Quitting would have been easier,” he said to Dean.
“But he now has things to live for,” his mother said again in Dean’s defense.
“Look, if my living is important to whatever this game you refer to, then let me live, dammit!” Dean said to his mother.
“He shows determination,” said Donnie
“He could change the outcome of the game if he lives,” said Joanne.
Ryan Jeffries, together with Ariel Toroshenko, showed up also at a table at the Rose Bowl. “I thought we concluded the outcome should play through?” asked Ryan.
“Perhaps these people do not like things to be predetermined for them?” asked Ariel.
“Exactly,” Dean said, sitting across from Ryan and Ariel. “That is what makes life worth living, the unpredictability of it all, and being able to make choices and learn from our consequences!”
“Yet we need to see our outcome,” Sloane said, inside a dark room.
“Well, why is this outcome so important?” asked Dean. “If I am to die here, then fine, let me die if my life is worth giving up and make sure your little outcome isn’t disturbed! But, what if something else comes along and throws a kink in your game, then what?”
Penny Fields looked at Dean. “And what if you’re wrong? What does this do to our outcome?” she asked.
Kevin looked at Dean and said, “For most parts we cannot change what has already happened.”
“I’m confused. Am I to live or am I to die?” Dean asked no one in particular and was just hoping someone would be able to give him a straight answer.
“Does he wish to know the outcome before others so he can try to influence the game?” the professor asked.
Rose Tyler, appearing in Dean’s apartment, said “Is that permitted?”
“Inconceivable!” barked Sloane. “It would throw the game out completely!”
“Well, what do you want from me?!” Dean bellowed into the heavens.
The Doctor looked puzzled at Dean’s question. “We wish to avoid a potential paradox.”
Martha Jones, sitting in the passenger seat of Dean’s Explorer with Dean at the wheel said “Maybe he is right. We cannot simply manipulate things for our own means.”
“I think you finally got it!” Dean said. “I mean that is the great thing about any game, you have to consider all outcomes, all moves and countermoves. And if something doesn’t end up going, in your favor, you do your best and change strategy. You don’t dwell on any past failed outcomes; you pick yourself up and continue to play on.”
“He seems to speak like he knows the game” Donnie said.
“Maybe he does. He may the actual key” Joanne guessed.
“What key? What exactly do you want from me?” Dean asked his bosses.
“A sacrifice is needed still though,” said Ric Flair.
“Indeed, but he is not the one to do so,” said Keith Richards.
“A sacrifice? Why does anyone need to die?” asked Dean. “Hasn’t there been enough death in the last while. What will one more life mean if there have been thousands upon thousands who have already been sacrificed?”
The Doctor looked at Dean after he posed the question. “Then why are you still here?”
Dean’s father appeared and answered “Because he is afraid. He is afraid of failing. He has always failed and he always will.”
“You’re damn right I’m afraid!” said Dean, “Because for the first time in a long time I am finally happy and here I am debating with whomever you are about my continued existence! And now it seems you think that whether I live or die is going to ruin or maintain your little game. Well, let me tell you something, if this all went down maybe a year ago, or two years ago, I would give up right now, die on that gurney and let you debate for longer whether or not one insignificant life meant something in the grand scheme of things. But back there, back in the real world, there is a woman who for whatever reason loves me! And being apart from her right now makes me feel sick to my stomach. I don’t want her to live with my death on her hands too!”
Karen Anderson, back holding her sister Tracy, looked at Dean and said “Enough innocent lives have been indeed lost. He is right; he shows compassion and concern for this ‘Karen’. They must continue on their path together.”
Rose Tyler spoke up “But will a sacrifice still be required?”
Kevin just looked at Rose and said “He has convinced us to forgo the predetermined outcome.”
“You are all making a mistake here!” shouted Dean’s father.
“And if they are, so what?” Dean asked back angrily. “That is what life is really about! Making mistakes and learning from them. And if you let me go back to Karen, I will make sure to do whatever I can to learn from one of my greatest mistakes!”
“It is decided then,” said Joanne. “He will continue on as planned.”
“But will the sacrifice still be needed?” asked Ariel.
“Sacrifices are a part of the game.” Flair and Richards chimed in together.
“But will he be ready when the right one makes the sacrifice?” asked Martha Jones.
“Time will tell,” Dean’s mother said. “His fate is out of our hands and back into his own will…”
“Hello? Is there anybody in there?”
Karen was standing above Dean as his eyes opened up. He let out a tired groan and rubbed his eyes.
“How do you feel, love?” Karen asked as she brushed her hands against the side of Dean’s cheeks.
“Weird,” chuckled Dean nervously. “How long was I gone for?”
“I don’t know, maybe an hour or so. But it seemed like forever.”
“You did good babe, you did good.” Dean said with a smile.
“Thanks, though Penny deserves some credit, much to my chagrin.” Karen said.
“For some reason, I think we need to find Kevin, Ryan, and Donnie.” Dean said as he slowly tried to sit up. Karen did her best restrain him a bit. ”You’re still not at full strength yet and I think you’re not fully healed yet,” she insisted.
“Tell me something, Kare Bear,” Dean began to ask “Where do you suppose they took Donnie to?”
“I heard something about the Edmonton branch of the research council. Then Ariel went total mercenary and took one of those Section 31 guys along with her.” Karen answered.
“Well, as soon as I am not so groggy, we’re taking a trip there and we’re going to get everyone home and far away from here as possible.”
“What makes you say that?” Karen asked Dean
“Not sure exactly, but I think it is part of my… destiny.” Dean said with a committed look on his face.
Dean Williams laid in the abandoned emergency ward, feeling tired and week. He closed his eyes…
Back at Movie Gallery, Donnie Bellum looked at Dean. “He is not a part of the outcome,” said Donnie. “His passing may or may not be a factor in the game.”
Joanne Carlson also looked at Donnie, then at Dean, and said “Not a major part of the game, no, but his existence must be prolonged so we can ensure the outcome is right.”
Dean found himself back at his childhood home. Both his parents looked at him and his father first spoke, “He is insignificant and useless to the game!”
His mother stood in defense and said, “Yet he does have a significant role in things to come.”
Dean looked around and was confused as to what was going on. “Am I dead? Am I being judged on all of my actions in my life?” He finds himself in his current apartment in Vegreville with Kevin, Karen, and Penny all sitting in the living room area.
“He tried to keep us on the right path,” said Kevin.
“Does he know as much as the other part of the game?” asked Penny.
“All I know is he must go on in the game,” said Karen.
“Well, I’m glad someone here has faith in me!” Dean exclaimed “But what is that game you keep referring to?”
A university professor in a lecture hall said “He is full of questions like the other one we spoke to.”
Sarah Bellum, holding her daughter Hailey spoke from behind Dean, while sitting in the lecture hall’s seating area. “But he is full of doubt,” she said.
“Well of course I am!” Dean said. “It’s not everyday a nuclear bomb strikes and I take a bullet in my stomach while foolishly trying to defend my girlfriend.”
Back at the Rose Bowl, Kevin and Karen sat at a table. “It was a noble act indeed,” said Karen.
“But an act that could have prematurely taken him out of the game,” a passing by waitress said.
“So, was I to let it hit Karen and let her die?” Dean asked.
His father appeared again. “Quitting would have been easier,” he said to Dean.
“But he now has things to live for,” his mother said again in Dean’s defense.
“Look, if my living is important to whatever this game you refer to, then let me live, dammit!” Dean said to his mother.
“He shows determination,” said Donnie
“He could change the outcome of the game if he lives,” said Joanne.
Ryan Jeffries, together with Ariel Toroshenko, showed up also at a table at the Rose Bowl. “I thought we concluded the outcome should play through?” asked Ryan.
“Perhaps these people do not like things to be predetermined for them?” asked Ariel.
“Exactly,” Dean said, sitting across from Ryan and Ariel. “That is what makes life worth living, the unpredictability of it all, and being able to make choices and learn from our consequences!”
“Yet we need to see our outcome,” Sloane said, inside a dark room.
“Well, why is this outcome so important?” asked Dean. “If I am to die here, then fine, let me die if my life is worth giving up and make sure your little outcome isn’t disturbed! But, what if something else comes along and throws a kink in your game, then what?”
Penny Fields looked at Dean. “And what if you’re wrong? What does this do to our outcome?” she asked.
Kevin looked at Dean and said, “For most parts we cannot change what has already happened.”
“I’m confused. Am I to live or am I to die?” Dean asked no one in particular and was just hoping someone would be able to give him a straight answer.
“Does he wish to know the outcome before others so he can try to influence the game?” the professor asked.
Rose Tyler, appearing in Dean’s apartment, said “Is that permitted?”
“Inconceivable!” barked Sloane. “It would throw the game out completely!”
“Well, what do you want from me?!” Dean bellowed into the heavens.
The Doctor looked puzzled at Dean’s question. “We wish to avoid a potential paradox.”
Martha Jones, sitting in the passenger seat of Dean’s Explorer with Dean at the wheel said “Maybe he is right. We cannot simply manipulate things for our own means.”
“I think you finally got it!” Dean said. “I mean that is the great thing about any game, you have to consider all outcomes, all moves and countermoves. And if something doesn’t end up going, in your favor, you do your best and change strategy. You don’t dwell on any past failed outcomes; you pick yourself up and continue to play on.”
“He seems to speak like he knows the game” Donnie said.
“Maybe he does. He may the actual key” Joanne guessed.
“What key? What exactly do you want from me?” Dean asked his bosses.
“A sacrifice is needed still though,” said Ric Flair.
“Indeed, but he is not the one to do so,” said Keith Richards.
“A sacrifice? Why does anyone need to die?” asked Dean. “Hasn’t there been enough death in the last while. What will one more life mean if there have been thousands upon thousands who have already been sacrificed?”
The Doctor looked at Dean after he posed the question. “Then why are you still here?”
Dean’s father appeared and answered “Because he is afraid. He is afraid of failing. He has always failed and he always will.”
“You’re damn right I’m afraid!” said Dean, “Because for the first time in a long time I am finally happy and here I am debating with whomever you are about my continued existence! And now it seems you think that whether I live or die is going to ruin or maintain your little game. Well, let me tell you something, if this all went down maybe a year ago, or two years ago, I would give up right now, die on that gurney and let you debate for longer whether or not one insignificant life meant something in the grand scheme of things. But back there, back in the real world, there is a woman who for whatever reason loves me! And being apart from her right now makes me feel sick to my stomach. I don’t want her to live with my death on her hands too!”
Karen Anderson, back holding her sister Tracy, looked at Dean and said “Enough innocent lives have been indeed lost. He is right; he shows compassion and concern for this ‘Karen’. They must continue on their path together.”
Rose Tyler spoke up “But will a sacrifice still be required?”
Kevin just looked at Rose and said “He has convinced us to forgo the predetermined outcome.”
“You are all making a mistake here!” shouted Dean’s father.
“And if they are, so what?” Dean asked back angrily. “That is what life is really about! Making mistakes and learning from them. And if you let me go back to Karen, I will make sure to do whatever I can to learn from one of my greatest mistakes!”
“It is decided then,” said Joanne. “He will continue on as planned.”
“But will the sacrifice still be needed?” asked Ariel.
“Sacrifices are a part of the game.” Flair and Richards chimed in together.
“But will he be ready when the right one makes the sacrifice?” asked Martha Jones.
“Time will tell,” Dean’s mother said. “His fate is out of our hands and back into his own will…”
“Hello? Is there anybody in there?”
Karen was standing above Dean as his eyes opened up. He let out a tired groan and rubbed his eyes.
“How do you feel, love?” Karen asked as she brushed her hands against the side of Dean’s cheeks.
“Weird,” chuckled Dean nervously. “How long was I gone for?”
“I don’t know, maybe an hour or so. But it seemed like forever.”
“You did good babe, you did good.” Dean said with a smile.
“Thanks, though Penny deserves some credit, much to my chagrin.” Karen said.
“For some reason, I think we need to find Kevin, Ryan, and Donnie.” Dean said as he slowly tried to sit up. Karen did her best restrain him a bit. ”You’re still not at full strength yet and I think you’re not fully healed yet,” she insisted.
“Tell me something, Kare Bear,” Dean began to ask “Where do you suppose they took Donnie to?”
“I heard something about the Edmonton branch of the research council. Then Ariel went total mercenary and took one of those Section 31 guys along with her.” Karen answered.
“Well, as soon as I am not so groggy, we’re taking a trip there and we’re going to get everyone home and far away from here as possible.”
“What makes you say that?” Karen asked Dean
“Not sure exactly, but I think it is part of my… destiny.” Dean said with a committed look on his face.
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